Friday, January 19, 2007

Confession time..

...because I have been SO naughty and lazy. The last time I hit the gym or did any good cardio workouts was on the day of the half-marathon on Sunday. I have been MAJORLY slacking off....BIG TIME! On top of that, I have been eating REALLY, REALLY bad. People who are close to me don't even now about my naughty eating has been this past week. I have been keeping it a HUGE secret until now. Here's the list of things that I have been eating this week starting on Monday (Sunday does not count because I am restoring my carbs, etc): One theatre-sized box of chocolate covered Tootsie Rolls

  • 5 piece of chicken nuggets and a Sour Cream and Chive baked potato (and LOTS of butter too)from Wendy's at the airport
  • A Regular-sized Roasted Beef Sandwich with a 5 piece of Loaded Baked Potato Bites from Arby's Bagel and Cream Cheese (at lunch with a salad...and a croissant)
  • Two large pieces of the cherry cheesecake I made as part of truce for my ex (Well, it worked...more later in this post! I know that I am going to get lectured after this.)
  • A Frosty from Wendy's with chopped M&M's (right before the 2nd piece of cherry cheesecake...before I went to bed alone!)
  • One really yummy piece of Flourless Chocolate Cake from Whole Foods that I ate after I talked before someone's bedtime tonight.
  • Countless pieces of chocolate candy out of the staff's candy jars since Wednesday
  • Two glasses of Chai Cider, which warmed me up tonight but loaded with 110 calories EACH
  • One Frosted Old-Fashioned Donut from Krispy Kreme (after my chiropractor appointment on Tuesday morning)
  • One whole mini pizza with hamburger, EXTRA mozzarella cheese, and basil from Old Chicago (and wished I had a BEER to go with it - DAMN IT!)
  • One whole bottle of Raspberry Lambic upon my arrival back home from Phoenix (and BOY did I need it...even after the 4 beers during the victory party the night before!)
  • One very yummy frosty tropical drink (with ALCOHOL!) at Kokomo's at the Mall of America with Danielle
  • Chicken Strips and garlic mashed potatoes at Kokomo's to go with the tropical drink
  • YUMMY Indian Food at my favorite Indian Restuarant in Roseville - THREE pieces of naan, Tandoori Chicken, Beef Josh, LOTS of RICE, rice pudding - SOOOO YUMMY, and those YUMMY fried malted balls drenched in sugary syrup that I ate later that evening with my salmon on Wednesday

There's more, but I can not think of it - or in total denial - right now. Anyway, I know that I am dealing with a lot on my plate right now - finishing up the divorce process, not being able to run because I am resting after the half-marathon until maybe Sunday, dealing with my soon-to-be ex who's still living with me, working two 12 hour shifts this week and one more thing that I am not ready to disclose...yet. I guess the damn emotional eating is starting to catch up to me again. I usually use the treadmill or eliptical to get rid of the stress and not feel guilty about eating this junk, but I know that the scale may catch up with me. Speaking of the divorce process, the divorce papers are SIGNED and ready to turned into the local family court. I was able to get the first part of the process done today, but have to wait a week before turning the original divorce papers. The lady at the family court told me that it could take as short as one week or as long as one month before the divorce is finalized by the judge and entered into the court by the court administrator. It took me over 16 months to get my first divorce finalized after losing my divorce attorney when I had surgery and changing judges too in the process. Of course, I was dealing with being married for over 7 years, owning a house, and having two children involved too. It makes a HUGE difference. This is the more quicker - and CHEAPER - version of the divorce. So technically I could be divorced by Valentine's Day if I get my way. I will be Chicago on February 10-13 for another visit with Josh as my host again so it will be a good time to have a get-together with any Chicago RBF members. Anyone for takers? Plus I also found out that my mom's selling the dream house that my late father built for them before he died. It is very painful issue for me. The house is the only thing left of my dad's memory. I hate to see it go. I want to beg my mom to reconsider, but she can not afford to live there. It's a very beautiful house too on a lake. Living on a lake in Minnesota is the ultimate dream, but will be a memory soon. I almost wish that my dad was still here and not gone. Anyways, I have attached in a previous post a song that is a little theme of my life. Well, that's according to this survey I took on, which matches that #1 song on your 18th birthday. This song was the theme to the 1992 show, "The Heights." This may be a show that you youngin's (those under the age of 25) may not remember or know, but it was one show that I watched when I was not working at my after-school job during my senior year of high school. (OMG...I am SO damn old!) It is similar to the Beverly Hills 90210, which I LOVED because it matched the same year that I graduated from high school in 1993.


jeanne said...

you have a LOT on your plate...(sorry for the pun, not intended). Give yourself a break. Get thru the divorce, then start back with good nutrition. Hang in there!

Full Metal Lunchbox said...

I can relate to the "emotional eating" problem.  Totally the story of my life.  I know how easy it is to just keep shoveling, as I myself gained back the 27 pounds I lost last year--while trianing for a marathon!!

I can only suggest what works for me: when tempted, when you feel like you "deserve" the unhealthy food, just remember what's good in your life and everything you are working for.

Anyway, I know you are a highly disciplined person and that you are already probably on top of your diet again by the time I'm typing this.

Good luck, Firefly!

Neese said...

sometimes i eat that way during my PMS time, maybe after you've typed it all out and read it, it'll help you in eating better. one day at a time!

Marty said...

That's a long list! And that was on in one day? : )) Just kidding, you're list is a small paragraph compared to my 20 pages! You should see what I've been shoveling down since I finished Houston. And that's including beer : ) A whole lot of beer... Take care FireFly, and I'll catch up with you later.


Laurie said...

I think I gained five pounds just by reading that! ;)

You have a lot going on in your life and it is understandable that you would be eating emotionally. Just don't let it spiral out of control. Take care.

Wes said...

After reading about you eating all that crap, I'm not coming back! LOL. You know I'm kidding!! You did just run a half-marathon. Your body is healing. Your mind needs soothing. You'll find that happy place again and when you do, all this stuff will slough off and you will be back in stride. We believe in ya, girl!

Danielle said...

Ah, emtional eating...can so relate. Although it's been a week now, get back to the gym, get some workouts in, plan a new strategy and get ready for your next race. The workouts will be good emotional stress relievers.